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[reproached]

@john.murphy | ■ ▲ ◌ ▼

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[reproached]

clarke just let you into her head

[jettisons]

[If only Bellamy could convey the proper amount of ??? over text.]

What's your point?

[reproached]

[ Keep ???ing forever, Bellamy. ]

how does it work

[jettisons]

Like the empathy bond I think. We touch, you remember something, and I see it.

[reproached]

sounds like a good way to see a hell of a lot more than you bargained for

[jettisons]

It's an offer. I'm not making you.

[reproached]

[ An offer? ]

wait

is this something you want or something you think i want

[jettisons]

[That's... a question. Murphy deserves an honest answer, and so Bellamy doesn't respond right away. He hesitates, mulling it over.

Unfortunately, it doesn't really help.]

I don't know.

[reproached]

where are you

[jettisons]

Leaving work.

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let's talk about this when you get home

[jettisons]

I'll be there soon.

[reproached]

[ And Murphy will just... keep lounging in bed, the way he's spent his whole day off, with a half-empty bottle of liquor tucked against his chest. Do not judge him. ]

[jettisons]

[It doesn't take long for Bellamy to figure out where Murphy is, considering the size of their apartment. When he pokes his head in through the door, his eyebrows go up immediately. He's sort of judging.]

Good day?

[reproached]

Don't be jealous. You could spend your days like this, too, if you just decided not to care.

[ Cheers! ]

[jettisons]

[He rolls his eyes.]

One of us has to care.

[reproached]

Yeah, well, you're off the clock now.

[ Murphy gestures in lazy invitation. Please, join him. ]

[jettisons]

[He sure does have a way with words. Bellamy's mouth twists, but he sits on the edge of the bed. He's all yours, Murphy.]

[reproached]

[ Murphy flops a bit closer. He could reach out and grab Bellamy, if he wanted to, but he doesn't just yet. ]

So... You wanna do a little psychic time traveling.

[jettisons]

[Bellamy reaches out to pluck the bottle away from him.]

You think it'll help?

[It had helped give him context with Clarke, but it had also been... intense.]

[reproached]

[ Wow, rude. Whatever! He was finished with it, anyway. ]

I don't need help. Do you need help?

[jettisons]

[Bellamy doesn't take a drink from the bottle, just keeps hold of it, quiet for a moment as he stretches out his legs. Does he need help? He's not sure. It feels different with Clarke. There's no sense of her being upset there, of her being disappointed, and he can't shake that sense with Murphy.]

It bothers you that I haven't been through those years on the ring.

[reproached]

[ He wants to simply deny that outright. Not because it's untrue, but because there's nothing Bellamy can really do about it. Not that it'll stop him from trying, Murphy knows. ]

Watching a few home movies isn't the same thing as being there. We can take a trip down memory lane if that's what you wanna do, but I am not asking you to be the same Bellamy I knew. That's not something I need from you, okay? It's already gone.

[jettisons]

[Somehow, that doesn't help. That idea of it already being gone twists inside him, and it flickers across his face for an instant.]

What do you need from me?

[reproached]

[ It shouldn't surprise him that Bellamy asks that, and yet. ]

Nothing.

[ Bound to be an unsatisfactory answer. ]

I'll just get over it. And you'll keep being who you are. You know, this isn't exactly new to me.